Having fun being a father and a web geek.
Hello, my name is
Who am Who am I? I am a
geek/programmer/webmaster/manager for the bestest company.
I write applications for Web Services and Windows. I also do on the side
contract programming as my time allows (which is not very much).
|Friday, August 01, 2014|
I miss my mom
from a talk I gave at church awhile back. I guess I forgot to post this here.
I grew up in sw iowa in a small town with a dad who had polio, A brother who was 20 years older than me Another brother who was 13 years older than me and had downes syndrome, My oldest brother lived right next door to me and his children I consider my adopted brothers. Both my brothers died at 35 years of age and 8 months. My mom died when I was 35 years of age and 6 months old. I wrote this alittle bit later. Right now is the 10 year anniversary of me turning 35 and 9 months. Think about that for a moment. this is something I wrote after my mom died. I was thinking today how thankful I am for my family and God and everything but how much I miss My parents and my brothers. so it reminded me of this.
I miss my mom. It is hard to say why and yet it isnít. I miss that lodestone of my life. The anchor that I had in a little town called Yorktown Iowa. I miss my mom. I miss my whole family. I have always had an anchor in my life. That anchor was Yorktown Iowa. I could always tell exactly where I was in relation to Yorktown. Weird that but I always knew exactly which way to go to find my way back there. Now I donít have that. Yorktown or at least my part of the town is gone now.
A few months ago my mom was diagnosed with Terminal Lung Cancer. Life has been hard these six months. We knew in August that something was wrong. You see mom lost 30 lbs between June 30th and August 15th. She was kind of happy about it. But everyone else was worried. I think she knew. She knew about 3 months before that when she finally quit smoking. She didnít tell me or anyone about that. Because she was a very private person. My mom didnít feel she had to be forth coming about everything with anyone but her husband and now since Dad was gone me. But she didnít tell me that she quit smoking and she only told me about the weight around the end of August.
In September Mom got sick for the first time with pneumonia. That was difficult but she recovered and went home. Then she got sick again. Recovery and home again. Still losing weight. God what is wrong? Finally the third time she got sick. I went down there and kind of brow beat the Doctors into releasing her into my care. Ok there wasnít much kind of about it. We took her to the Docs here in DSM. That is where we found out about the cancer. This was the first part of October. The news hurt us all. We didnít tell the children. And my mom tough as she is asked the really hard questions that I was scared to ask. After that day Mom and I discussed some hard and difficult things. Questions you never want to deal with.
Mom stayed with us for about two weeks. During that time she recovered exceedingly well. Amazingly. I think for her knowing what was actually wrong was a relief. I mean I think she knew but now I knew and she felt good about my knowing. I was her confidant. She told me everything. She didnít like not being honest with me. I think everyone needs someone they can be totally honest with. For my mom it was me. That is a huge responsibility for a Son to face. But it was truly awesome to have the level of trust with my mom. I canít tell you what that meant to me to have her total trust and belief in me and my decisions for her.
Eventually we moved her back to an assisted living place near the town she had lived in for the last 40 years. This was better for her but I missed her. I liked having her near me so I could talk with her. But she was right and I was wrong. Which is a usual case. You see My mom was my principal source of advice over the years. If I had a difficult question in life I would always go to my parents and my wife. The advice that they gave me over the years was always correct. Or at least almost always.
After we moved her down the Eiler house in Clarinda I made it my goal to see her at least once a week on Tuesdays. I took off every Tuesday to go see her. I would get up at 5am and drive the 2 and a half hours down to Clarinda. I would then eat breakfast with Charlie and Darwin and my dadís best friends. Then I would go up to Eiler house and see my mom. I canít tell you the joy that shown on her face when I walked into the facility. Mom was always so ready to see me. She was like a little girl. A very wise little girl. She lit up when I came in the room and that in turn brightened my spirits. We usually would sit and talk for awhile about what we were going to do. Then we almost always did the same thing. We would drive around and do some errands that she only trusted me with. Then we went out to the house and checked on her beautiful old house. Then to lunch and back to Eiler house. After that I would leave because she would be tired from a full morning of running around. I usually got home before 5pm.
We did a lot of things for closure during those months. We went and visited the farm stead where my mom grew up. I didnít understand how important that was until now. We went on car trips like we did when I was just 14 and 15. We went to Nebraska City and Maryville. It was fun. And she loved it.
Around Thanksgiving we had a huge party for mom. We invited all the family. About 50 people showed up. We rented the town hall right next to her house and spent a small fortune on food and drinks. Mom was always worried about money. But heck I didnít care. I didnít want the money and I still donít. We had a blast. Mom had so much fun seeing her family and close friends and all the small children playing together. Her Grandchildren and great grand children and nieces and wow. There was a lot. If you ever get the chance to throw a big party do it.
December was fun and Christmas was really nice. Mom said she was feeling better. Mom was trying to convince me that she was good enough to move back home to her house. She had me half convinced. I think she knew though. I made her agree that we would wait until March to see how she was doing. Christmas was spent with close family. Her grandchildren and my in-laws and that was it. Mom was tired a lot and we just enjoyed every minute we could with her.
January is the only month I have some small regrets. Yo`u see things got busy in January. Helene was gone for a week to a conference. I couldnít get down that week. Then the next week work was a zoo and I couldnít get away for nothing. Eventually the calls started coming in. Your mom had a bad night last night. She is on the O2 again. Another bad night she is hurting a lot. Rod you need to come down ASAP. Hurry down.
Rod she passed away just now 2am. Her last words to me were. ďYou made it home safe. Your safe. Good.Ē
There are too many people to thank. I canít thank some of you enough. My co workers for there support. My Boss for his flexibility, My wife for her understanding. My friends for there caring. But most of all my mom. In that last few months I learned a few more things about being a Christian. Make peace with all. Even those you have long disliked. Have someone you trust completely and can tell all your bad stuff too. And have fun. Christians need to remember that life is fun. My mom enjoyed her life. Even though she lost two sons, her husband and almost all her siblings before she died. She loved life. She said to me you attract more flies with honey than with vinegar. She wanted people to like her and to understand what she was. She was a Christian. She talked about being a hap hazard Christian. I sometimes am not sure what that meant. But I think it meant being happy about being a Christian. If that is it. Then that is what I want to be. Thank you Mom.
I want to end with some advice my mom gave once.
I donít understand spending a fortune on plastic surgery. Just take away your husbands bi-focals.
Stay married. TV isnít about being married it is about lust. Being married is about finding your best friend and sticking by them no matter what. Helene I truly enjoy spending time with you.
Laugh at the weird people but remember your weird too.
Does it really matter what denomination you are? No do you believe in Jesus you better! You see that snow that is God. You feel can feel his presence here canít ya? Isnít that great? Let me leave you with this. Jesus is real. God is real. Jesus is love just pure forgiving love. Life will be wonderful when we get to heaven and I am looking forward to being reunited with my family.
|Wednesday, July 30, 2014|
Alittle too much rain.
We have had flooding conditions on Saylorville Lake for the last two months. This was about the worst of it. I am almost surprised all of those logs had not washed down into the spillway. But it was still going strong and kicking out a ton of water.
It was a fun afternoon to take pictures. I like how this panoramic turned out.
|Monday, July 14, 2014|
Hiding from online is probably useless. But misinformation might be the way to go.
We have all heard the stories about things being stolen online. My name, My birthday, my phone number. WE have also all probably read the stories about how to hide from Google, NSA, Facebook. I have friends that are not on Facebook just because they worry about them having too much information. I agree with them. I do not like Google or Facebook and especially anyone I am supposed to "trust". But hiding from them is nearly impossible.
You cannot hide, You seriously cannot hide. Even if your not on Facebook or Google Plus. Your Friends probably are. And they are probably posting pictures of you when your at the backyard bbq. You don't even know it. And you have probably purchased something at either Target or Michael's, and well now your information has been stolen and is out on the web in some Torrent somewhere. So I recommend another course of action.
Join them, Yeppers, But with one twist. Don't you ever post any full truths. My friend just asked me today why my brithday on facebook was a few days off my real birthday. Because I don't trust Facebook. My main reason for being on Twitter, Facebook and Google Plus? It is honestly to keep in touch with friends or to give friends another avenue to contact me. But my secondary reason? Is to keep tabs on everything that is being said about me and my family. And to counteract all that information with miss-information. Seriously one of the best things we could all do is make the information that is collected about us, totally meaningless.
Think about it. If everyone on their social networks or anywhere it doesn't really matter, just put in parts of your name or address when they ask for it(or someone else's, I lived in Gus, Iowa for a bit NOT!). Put your birthday a year or even 10 off your real birthday. Heck according to Facebook I should retire pretty soon here (I still have 20 years to go). But heck I go a step further. Anywhere I can (except employment and banking) I never ever put in the same information. I also post about my vacations a week after, or months before. My purpose is to make any information collected about me totally meaningless.
For that reason I also search for shopping things once in awhile just to be weird. I also let the kids use my lappy to search things on Amazon. :) I didn't know I wanted a new horse corral. Did you? That is the latest thing that Google pushed into my gmail feed the other day. I would say at this point I have the online merchandisers a little confused. And that is just where I want them.
|Tuesday, July 08, 2014|
Colors Men and Women
By now most of you have seen this?
or some variation of that. I agree when it comes to painting the walls in my house, or selecting a shirt color or some such thing as that. I can only see about 10 colors. Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Purple, Brown, Black, White, Grey(Gray). That is about it. I only see Pink or say the name pink under duress.
I have two shoe colors, Brown and Black. I have at most 6 pairs of shoes.
I agree in most circumstances that men cannot name the colors that women can. We can see the difffering shades but the difference between Mauve and Violet are just lost on me. They are both pink. Shades of pink but pink none the less. And Pink isn't really a color. It is just red with white added to it. I only know of pink after marriage and after having had 2 daughters. I know pink. But in my mind Pink isn't a color it is just a shade of red.
Now onto a more important discussion. Men do actually have names for colors. I "knew" this but only this week did it hit me in the face. We were discussing the color of a car. Gray said a couple of women. "EXCUSE ME" That car is not merely Gray. IT is metallic grey with overtones of brown. Bam! Wall. Did I just say that? Really me a man. Did I just go there?
So with that let me propose the following color chart for men and women in regards to car colors.
|Tuesday, July 01, 2014|
Trip to Denver.
My slow motion video post of our trip to Denver. It was scary at points. The Rain and Hail on the way out. The wreck of the bicycles on Pikes Peak. You really need to watch this to the end. The helicopters coming in in front of the storm with the lightening. It was craziness.
We had alot of fun. But awesome. Daphne tried out for the voice. David played in the junior Olympics in racquetball. We visited pikes peak. That is one scary drive. Spent time with my wonderful cousin and her awesome family. Ate really awesome food. Drank a drink or four. Enjoyed Denver a lot. Drove allot.
All in all a great vacation
Full link can be found here
triptodenver1 from Rod Bergren on Vimeo.
Music is from http://www.arstidir.com/ They are awesome. Go buy their music.
|Monday, May 26, 2014|
SW Iowa Storm rolling in.
SW Iowa, we were driving towards the storm. Is that a good idea????
it was pretty.
|Friday, May 02, 2014|
I know it rained all week and it was dreary
and the sun didn't shine and it was cloudy and everyone was in a bad mood because of the rain for 6 days straight.
But I got some great pictures.
pictures are here.
Other stuff of interest to people possibly.
Trip to Tahiti.
is nice as well